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Posted By: blito3 Dec 18, 2004 - 02:12 pm

HI my name is Juha Koivu and thought i would write a bad scifi novel.
beginning with the first chapter


The Centurian probe. by Juha Koivu 2004 dec

"a pleasent orbit"

It aproached the planet with little regard of any attempts at its destruction.
The Probe had allready analyzed the techonology available
that would be used against it as negligiable. So it contued at a leisurley pace.
So far there had been no actuall attack but the prescans of the planet helped it choose which protocall to persue.
thousands of objects circled the planet, most serving no perpose other then obsticals for those bellow reaching orbit.
He, the probe was not near the main orbit clutter of these objects.
Choosing a nice spot to park near a couple of high orbiting unused satalites, since he didnt see any indications of his
being seen yet. Time for some recreation, turning his attention from the planet to recording made long ago.
Curious videos and multi vocal signals that had allready been translated and stored from the same said planet since
its broadcast started to arrive at GreenStar. A probe was readied and sent forth, him.
This had been 75 light years ago. Since the probe traveled at 3 times this speed, oh sure it would of gone faster.
But the orders were to monitor the tech as it grew on the planet.
No point in arriving early to look at a bunch of primatives.

After a minute or two it finished its recreation, hmmmm. The pause was so that it could Plan
its non plan. In truth the probes sent out had no actual goal but to aquire information, Wave the Flag and such
other mundane tasks that would be broadcast back the GreenStar. These Broadcasts back to homeworld had never
stopped, but now multipule channels had been set up for broader range of opptions for the veiwers.
He decided to review a few of the video images again, one of these where black and white.
The black and white one was of to humans, why yes thats what they like to call themselves.
Talking back and forth in a fast stuccato manner. I do enjoy it, the tall ones seems to enjoy
angering the little fat one. Next was a building that rented rooms by the nite, called "faulty towers".
This one choked a few of my curcuits, I kept looping a few times the same curcuit.
hmmm...must be laughter. Most enjoyable.
Then Quicky called "alliens", me belonging to a group of them how could i refuse.
Followed it up with thing called "StarWars", A large galactic empire epic....not very profitable and
impossible to control the population. Being that space is 3 dimensional and exponetionally speaking unmanageable
from a central authority. Finally these were over I had to get my veiwers on these book things.

So the first mission will be to aquire some of these books.

Posted By: Bmat Dec 18, 2004 - 02:57 pm

There are so many grammar and spelling errors that the bit of plot presented is mostly obscured. I can see that this work would have some promise as an introduction to a humorous science fiction piece.

I'd like to see what the result is with your story cleaned up.

Posted By: blito3 Dec 18, 2004 - 04:26 pm

The centurian probe. by juha koivu

chapter 2(shh...ok they are very small chapters)

"H9"

a few choice cities to visit was Newyorkcity, tokyo, mexicocity, very populated.
So having one of my helpers blend in when looking about wont be a problem.
I was going to choose helper3 out of storage, helper9 kept bagdering me.
well since H9 hasnt been on a mission in a while i pulled it out of its slot.
its main memory stem came fully active as it unfolded itselt.
Helpers you see are spindley metal tubed multi jointed machines.
much like a stick figure, yet to be filled out.
now to choose the guise....I decide to try out the Place called NYC.
Perfect!H9 nine started to fill out the perameters of the image.
first the holoimage surounded the spindly form. Micro force feed back
fields started to colaberate themselves to the shape of the hologram.
Once the figure stabalized....language of natives was absorbed allso some
mannerisms.
Standing before me a perfect quise.
yellow hard hat, short stout construction clothes.
"hey baby, Ya want a piece of this" H9 blurted out as his first official
words. By this time his hand was swqueezing between his legs, giving it a
shake or two.
H9 was ready for the mission. unholoing himself H9 walked over to a small canister.
a proceeded to insert itself into it. This insertion canister was the size of
a small flying creature found to be populating this city. the canister signaled all
was ready. a few movements and it lay in a cradle of the launcher.
There was only the slightest of noises as the launcher started its journey.
I watched as it followed its flight plan. Very uneventfull. the cooling system
aboard didnt even allow for a streak in the atmotsphere. It landed perfectly
in the middle of the large patch of green that occuppied the city.
Centeral park, plenty of hiding spots. The canister hid itself and monitored
the still daylit area, sure a nite landing would of been nice but the pictures
are bad. once the all clear sounded, H9 unlimbered itself out and started up
the holosequence.
"oh yeah" crinking his neck for effect, H9 looked around scratched his
stubbled face. Looking like he just came from a nite at a pub, his personeo
was ready to roll. He must of been too excited cause H9 started to jog down
walkways after observing others doing the same. A litte reminder slowed him
to a swaggering stroll.

Posted By: blito3 Dec 18, 2004 - 04:31 pm

oh i speak english well....just cant write it...LOL...I prefer math science analyzing and more interesting stuff.
i just want see if i can insert a few chapters a day in to see how it goes as i make things up on the spot...now that fun.

Posted By: blito3 Dec 18, 2004 - 05:34 pm

The centurian probe. by juha koivu

chapter 3(shh...ok they are very small chapters)

"a walk in and out of the park"

H9 had just about made it out of the park.
A few lude remarks and a few pert "FU's" as
a responce were his first comunications.
All was going well, no plan is perfect so i am expecting the worst.
this way i wont be disapointed. Only 4 hours in orbit, data started to
pile up into my storage. I cant read and anaylze everybit of frivioulity.
so my data will now be transmitted raw to homeworld plus any data needed
that of interest will be prioritorized. My memory core has unlimited
storage. So when it reaches its capacity, my engineers will scratch their heads.
Back to prime. H9 had hit a main junction and was trying to pick a nice random
direction to voyage off too. Being to smart, he decided to ask someone.

looking up "hey bud....do you or your girlfriend know wheres the nearest bookstore
located?". after saying that H9 horks a loogy unto the sidewalk.
The person in question sitting atop a fine looking beast gives H9 a look.
Now this didnt look good."WHAAAAt?" H9 responds to the look.If i had orbs i would
be rolling them up. I nudge H9. He does a little stumble.
"did you have any drink today sir?" says it turns out to a law enforcement officer.
I gave myself a chuckle. sorry, I was laughing at the thought
of a living being being a law enforcement officer.
now this officer asked for some ID. No problem as long as does exceed the holos range.
H9 flipps out his wallet, lotsa cash and lotsa ID.
"here ya go, officer"only being a little less surly, but surly enough H9 passes up
the wallet.

As the oficer grabs his wallet, the holoemiters and force projecters tried to keep track.
Good enough at close range. But the officer did manage to handle the wallet.
good enough for now. There was a noise of 2 of the veicles driving down the roads
had collided and the ensueing yells attracted the officer.
"wait here for a second sir. and i will be back"
"hey what about my wallet?" H9 blurts out as his holoimaging and force profecters
started to lose track.
The officer on horse trotted up to the 2 combatents. H9 fully recording the action.
Wallet no where to be seen, having dissapeared from the hand of unbeknownst rider.
on his way back the officer started to pat himself all over.
H9 hands across chest "well, ya gonna gimmee my wallet or what"
"I seem to have lost it sir?" a perplexed officer says. looking about as he road
his horse from the scene of the accident back to H9.

Posted By: blito3 Dec 18, 2004 - 09:01 pm

i got my head stuffed with so many ideas if i dont write down this gibberish it might explode.
i prefer othe people polish the stones...i just drop them.