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	Subtopic	Started By	Posts
	Archive through Dec 14, 2004 Last Post: Dec 15, 2004, 02:59 pm		20

Posted By: redshift Dec 14, 2004 - 06:47 pm

Yow. I used to be a Boy Scout (which is funny all by itself, but not the point of the story) and once we took a trip to Boston to do the history tour thing. At one point we came across a giant statue of Paul Revere on his horse. One of the dads, who was usually a jerk and not funny at all, said "Does anyone have any questions about the gender of Paul's horse?" We almost fell over laughing. Old Paul may get all the glory, but that horse's gear was truly legendary.

Posted By: Magus Dec 14, 2004 - 06:53 pm

Posted By: redshift Dec 14, 2004 - 07:09 pm

I just didn't feel comfortable discussing both of these topics in the same post, so I'm posting again.

I don't remember who my favorite Sesame Street character was when I was a kid, but now, I'd have to say it's The Count. I like his voice, and the idea of a happy, laid-back vampire who's endlessly delighted by... counting stuff.

He doesn't bother teaching any Life Lessons. When Elmo starts talking about his feelings, or a lost toy, or some stupid thing, the Count just gets distracted by a trio of butterflies and wanders off laughing. He's got no worries.

Posted By: ~*FallenFaerie*~ Dec 15, 2004 - 02:06 pm

Elmo is quite possibly the most annoying character on children's television. the teletubbies and arthur's sister DW come in close seconds.but who wouldn't be annoying with a name like dora winifred?(if you're wondering how i know this much about children's programming, i babysat a two year old with satelite tv last summer. want me to sing the dora the explorer song? d-d-d-d-d-dora, d-d-d-d-d-dora, dora dora dora the explorer! who's that super cool exploradora? ill stop now, before i hurt myself...) there's a cool word for you: exploradora. but i loved snuffy's eyelashes, dont ask why, i dont know. if big bird got in a fight with barney and mister rodgers, who would win?

Posted By: Magus Dec 15, 2004 - 02:59 pm

"He doesn't bother teaching any Life Lessons. When Elmo starts talking about his feelings, or a lost toy, or some stupid thing, the Count just gets distracted by a trio of butterflies and wanders off laughing. He's got no worries."

Yes! Count is awsome!...for a seaseme street character.

And, besides, what was the big deal with those Tickle Me Elmo's a few years back?

Posted By: redshift Dec 15, 2004 - 04:19 pm

Ah, yes. Tickle Me Elmo. I think for every one of those sold, there were at least ten sleazy jokes made about it. It's like Michael Jackson - how can you not laugh?

Big Bird vs. Barney vs. Mister Rodgers... Faerie, this is just too ridiculous to get out of my head. Remember this when you call your bookie:

The living Mr. Rodgers would never get into any kind of fight. He'd find a way to work out everyone's differences, and then take them to the Land of Make Believe where that pompous King would give Barney and Big Bird a scolding. The dead Mr. Rodgers would kick both their butts, whether as a ghost or zombie. Big Bird and Barney's knowledge of the occult is (at best) limited, and they'd have no idea how to handle him. First round knockout.

Barney vs. Big Bird presents a much more interesting matchup.

Barney's strengths: He's a friggin' dinosaur. Weight advantage, and a low center of gravity. Tail, for some tricky knock-you-on-your-butt Mortal Kombat action. Built like a tank.
Weaknesses: Clumsy and awkward. A brain the size of a walnut.

Big Bird's strengths: A long pointy beak, and a longer reach. Height advantage. Faster and much more agile. Raised on the streets.
Weaknesses: Vulnerable to lower-body attacks. Not as strong or tough.

Advantage: Big Bird - but not by a huge margin. The Bird has the skills, but Barney is naturally a tough customer. With training, he could do some serious damage.

Posted By: Magus Dec 15, 2004 - 05:41 pm

I know that my sister's A.P. US Government class the other year had a discussion on who would win in a fight, Thomas Jefferson or John Adams. They chose Thomas Jefferson because he had a much longer reach.